~ The power of somatic work for conquering anxiety and accelerating your trauma healing journey ~
How many times have you been told, whether by a well-meaning friend, guided meditation or elsewhere, to ‘get out of your head?’ To ‘stop thinking’ or ‘stop over thinking’? To ‘slow down the thoughts’ and ‘still the mind’? I have heard this countless times over the last 11 years, particularly in the realm of new-age spirituality.
A lot of the techniques and tools that are taught through practices such as yoga, meditation and other mindfulness or spiritually-based systems just didn’t fully work for me. Many of these practices are pretty ancient and lineage-based. I had tonnes of faith in them, believing in their promises. I figured if a practice was thousands of years old and had that much documented success, then surely it would work, right??
These ancient practices that have been revived today have been sworn to be timelessly effective. To be appropriate for our crazy, chaotic modern day lives. I explored many paths. Different off-shoots of yoga, some ancient, some modern. From traditional tantric hatha, kriya, vinyasa krama and ashtanga, to yin, kundalini, restorative and modernised vinyasa/flow. I learnt traditional Theravada Buddhist practices and a whole-spectrum of random mindfulness exercises for specific effects. I dived into sound healing and chanting mantra for many years. I practiced shamanic journeying and honouring my menstrual cycle. I spent time tracking my cycle and moving with the moon, discovering my astrological birth chart and pulling apart the placements to help me understand myself better.
I cannot discount a single one of these systems and their accompanying practices. Every time I explored a new path I took what felt good for me and added it to what I now call my Treasure Chest of Tools. Some say this is the path of the mystic. In an effort to move away from labels and boxing myself in, I would say this is simply my path, the way I’ve chosen to walk it (read more here about this journey).
All of these systems and practices served me in some way. Yoga helped me realise that I even had a soul and opened my eyes to the spiritual realm. Buddhism helped me understand the nature of existence on this planet and the laws of the universe. Sound healing and chanting mantra brought me cleansing and joy, and helped me restore my voice. Shamanism and menstrual honouring deeply connected me to my inner cycle and how it links with all the cycles of nature outside of me. Astrology gave me a guide post when I felt lost.
But it was when I found somatic therapy that I really integrated and embodied all of the amazing knowledge I had accumulated from exploring these varied pathways throughout my twenties. Throughout the accumulation phase, every now and then I heard the inner voice of my higher self: ‘you need to stop studying and start practicing’.
I was stuck in my head. I was attempting to practice yoga or meditate but I could never ‘calm the mind’ so that I could connect to my soul, higher self, spirit, etc… The biggest promise of these pathways, enlightenment, or liberation, felt beyond my reach. Especially during the periods of time that I was deep in the traditional yogic paths. The more I tried to commit to a consistent daily practice the more pressure I felt. The harder it was for me to calm the mind, the more shame I felt. The more the inner critic had a chance to jump in the drivers’ seat and overtake, to shout out the same old thoughts: ‘See??! You suck! You can’t even sit still for ONE MINUTE!! How on earth are you going to reach your goal of peace??? You’re never good enough and never will be!’ As you can imagine, this just made me feel small, inadequate and totally deflated.
Somatic therapy helped me tie everything together. It finally helped me practice in a real way, a way that worked for ME. It helped me begin to feel safe in my body, so that I COULD get out of my head. Because, if you get out of your head, where do you go?? There’s really only one other place to go…. The body. Your body. That is where the present moment is. Our mind is mostly filled with rumination on the past or fear of the future. The body holds the feelings that are happening in present moment.
But for so long, my body was wrought with trauma that was still unprocessed, despite all the work I had been doing. Through somatic therapy, when I finally turned toward myself, toward my body, my inner child, all parts of me, where all the pain and memories were stored, in my nervous system, in my physical, energetic and emotional bodies, that’s when the deepest healing began. That’s when I could finally begin to truly digest my traumatic past experiences. Digest them in a way that was safe, and in a way that meant the outcome was more coherence and understanding. In neuroscience this is called memory reconsolidation, in psychodynamic psychotherapy it is called a corrective emotional experience. By turning toward myself, my pain, my sadness, my rage, my loneliness – by turning toward these parts of myself I had refused to look at, due to shame and also simply not having the tools or guidance to be able to look at them and transform them.
This deeper work allowed me to digest so much pain that I was carrying that over time I felt lighter, cleaner, less desperate and less fearful. I began to be able to rely on myself more. I became more dependable and consistent, for myself as well as others. I can hardly describe how beautiful this feeling is. When your body feels like a safe space, when you don’t fear your feelings, because you know you have the capacity to feel them all the way through, and the tools to support you when it gets really hard, that’s when life truly shifts. That’s when I could finally fully cut off a domestic violence relationship. It’s when I could commit to completing my Masters at uni and my future career path. It’s when I could leave a place that never felt like home, to a place that does. It’s when I could truly start to learn to hold my own child through his big feelings, because I had learnt to hold myself in my own.
Have you been searching for deeper healing? Somatic therapy is where it’s at! Book here to start your true trauma healing journey. Not sure about a 1:1 yet? Come to my next Women’s Workshop to get a better feel! More information here.
